Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
