Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize