Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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