You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
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