How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
