did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize