SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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