lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
