i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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