Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
We had to coat check the pizza.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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