i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
