I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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