Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
So much Jack, so little girl.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
