ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
