I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
