why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
