i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize