I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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