Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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