I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
