3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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