I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
