Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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