Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
