That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
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