yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
