Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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