She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
