my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
