ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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