College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
