Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
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She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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