Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
This show inspires me to have sex in space
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
