she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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