it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
