Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
