party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
i now understand why vodka
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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