Plan B is the new Plan A
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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