what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
