I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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