4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
