its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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