So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
