I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize