scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
