wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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