I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
