You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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