Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
