Is it normal to miss your booty call?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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